Episode 03: Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies, I’m your host Julie Mattson. Part of our job consists of notifying family when a loved one has passed away, and many times no one, neighbors or close friends, know of any family members of the deceased. It makes it really difficult for us to hunt down the legal next of kin, the person who would be responsible for carrying out funeral arrangements. When someone passes away and and they don’t have a family member that we can locate, we’ll go through the house and try to find their phone, look through their phone to see if we can find any phone numbers or any indication of someone that they’ve called regularly. a friend or a close family member. Neighbors, many times, will be the ones who call the police for a welfare check, because Mr. Smith next door used to get the mail every morning and they haven’t seen him in a few days. They go over and knock on his door, he doesn’t answer. They call 911, Police go over, fire department forces entry and finds him deceased in bed. So, I just encourage everybody, if you have a friend that you know does not have family or a neighbor that doesn’t get many visitors, make me just check on them just to make sure that they’re okay.
Listen in…
SHOW NOTES:
• We realized that a lot of people are estranged from their families. And so I guess what I like to do is always encourage people to have someone that can check on them on a daily basis, or just to check and make sure that they’re okay. So if there’s an elderly person that lives next door to you, please check on them, they don’t always have family, they don’t always have someone that’s calling them to make sure they’re feeling okay, or to take them to the doctor. To me, the worst thing in the world would be to be at home alone, pass away, and no one know or care. So I always am encouraged when neighbors are the ones who call the police to check on someone because they haven’t seen them. Many, many times, someone doesn’t show up for work and their employer will call the police and ask for a welfare check because they have not been to work in two days, or they’re never late, and they were supposed to be there at 7:00, and it’s 8:30. They’re not answering their phone, you hate to suspect the worst, but if this is not a normal thing that occurs, of course, you panic somewhat, especially if the person is older or has health problems. So, a lot of ways, and you always hear this to know that something’s wrong is if the mail piles up. If someone hasn’t been getting their mail, many mailmen have called for welfare checks because mail is accumulating in the mailbox. (01:46)
• A lot of people are on fixed incomes everywhere, not just Texas. But a lot of people will not run their air conditioner in the summer to try to save money because they’re on a fixed income, or they don’t want to go to the doctor because they don’t have insurance, and so this happens a lot. I’m not saying as a neighbor that we should take all of our neighbors to the doctor and making it our responsibility to check on them daily, but just kind of pay attention to our surroundings and notice when someone doesn’t do the things they normally do. I love that neighbors watch out for each other because to me, that would just be horrifying if you’re elderly and you’re widowed and you live alone, and you fall, and its days before someone even knows that you’re on the ground. And then if you pass away, it could be a number of days still before someone misses you because you don’t actually speak to anyone on a daily basis and you’re rarely outside and you don’t go places, all those kinds of things. So anyway, that being said, I always encourage everyone to reach out and make a friend or somebody that you can talk to at least every other day that knows that you’re okay, or knows that you haven’t been feeling good. (04:09)
• So, many people will also be super organized, they will have all of their doctor’s cards securely and safely in their wallet, and all we do is open their wallet, and low and behold, they have seen all kinds of specialists, they have a primary care doctor. They have a neat little calendar that has all their appointments written on it, that makes our job easy, right? Because we can even reach out to a doctor and say, Hey, will you peek at the medical records and let us know who this person has listed as their legal next of can or emergency contact? So at least it gives us options. But it is scary to think that anyone could get to the point where they could die and be there for days because no one checks on them. So, if you’re by yourself, find a little friend, someone that you can call, someone that you can talk to even every couple of days if you don’t have family. Whether it be a co-worker or a neighbor, just somebody that is aware of what’s going on and can help you if you need it. (06:28)
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