Last week, I took you through the devastating events of January 24, 2023, the night Lindsay Clancy’s three young children, Cora, Dawson, and Callan, were fatally harmed inside their family home in Duxbury, Massachusetts. This week, we move from the home to the courtroom. In The Lindsay Clancy Trial: Psychosis, Premeditation, or Both?, I take a closer look at one of the most complicated questions surrounding this case: What was happening in Lindsay Clancy’s mind when her children died? Lindsay’s mental health before the deaths has become a critical part of understanding the case. Her treatment, medications, reported symptoms, and concerns surrounding postpartum mental illness raise difficult questions about postpartum depression and postpartum psychosis, and about how severe psychiatric illness affects criminal responsibility. But there is another side to this case. The circumstances surrounding that night also raise questions about planning and awareness. Lindsay’s husband, Patrick, left the home to run errands. During the relatively short period he was gone, the lives of all three children were changed forever. So how does the legal system distinguish between an intentional, premeditated act and an act committed by someone experiencing profound psychosis? Can a person appear organized or purposeful while simultaneously experiencing a severe break from reality? And where does mental illness end and legal responsibility begin? As a nurse and former forensic death investigator, I’m particularly interested in the intersection between the medical evidence and the investigative evidence. A case like this cannot be understood through one piece of information alone. We have to look at the timeline, behavior, medical and psychiatric history, physical evidence, statements, expert opinions, and what investigators were able to establish. We also have to remember why this trial is happening. Three young children lost their lives. Whatever conclusions are ultimately reached about Lindsay’s mental state and criminal responsibility, Cora, Dawson, and Callan remain at the center of this case. In this episode, I explore the competing questions surrounding the Lindsay Clancy trial and the challenge of evaluating a case in which mental illness and evidence of apparent planning may exist alongside one another. Was this postpartum psychosis? Was it premeditation? Or is the truth more complicated than either explanation alone? Join me for Part Two of the Lindsay Clancy case on Pushing Up Lilies: The Lindsay Clancy Trial: Psychosis, Premeditation, or Both? EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. 00:10 Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you. Are you ready? Hey, guys, welcome to another episode of Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie. I’m recording today from my med spa. 00:40 I have to admit I love, love, love this microphone. I hope it sounds as good as it sounds in my headset. 00:48 But wanted to bring to your attention, and I know I may have mentioned it last week, but we are having our second annual Murder Mystery Dinner. 00:58 This year is gonna be on October 10th in Krum, Texas, at Studio 141, and we’re gonna have an amazing, immersive murder mystery dinner catered by Our Blended Table. 01:13 And if you haven’t had their food, let me just tell you, it’s amazing. 01:18 It’s gonna be very interactive, a great chance to meet people who love true crime, and also an opportunity to meet and speak with Ann Byrum. 01:30 Now, many of you may not know who Ann is, but Ann is the mother of Kelly Ann Cox, and Kelly was actually abducted in Denton back in 1997 from a gas station in- very near the Denton Police Department after a tour of the jail with her criminal justice class from UNT. 01:54 And Ann loves to remind us how important it is to kinda watch your back and always use the buddy system. This happened to Kelly Ann during the day. 02:09 I mean, it was daylight right in front of the police department with officers going in and out on a very busy road. 02:17 I’m so thankful and grateful that Ann has offered to come up from Houston and be my speaker, and so I’m very much looking forward to talking to her. 02:29 We’re gonna do an interview with her, and then we’re gonna open up the floor for questions. Now, I’m also going to have a booth at the Day of the Dead Festival. I’m not racing this year. 02:42 They went up a little bit on the cost, and I just decided that I would rather spend that money advocating, so I turned it around a little bit. 02:51 This year I’ll just have a merch booth, but we’re gonna have hoodies, we’ll have T-shirts, we’ll have pins, we’ll have plenty of stickers, and the comic book. 03:02 The comic book will be there, and I’ll be glad to sign those as well. 03:07 And we’ll also be at the Overdose Awareness event on the square in Denton, Texas, on August 31st, so that’s coming up right around the corner. 03:18 It’s so crazy to think that it’s already September or almost September. It makes me wanna go Christmas shopping. 03:24 It’s never too early, I think, to just go look around, see what you can find, and the Hobby Lobby already has their Christmas stuff out. 03:32 That kinda drives me crazy to think that really in July they started doing that. I don’t like it, because I like to just celebrate my seasons. 03:42 I wanna celebrate Thanksgiving without my Christmas tree up. So anyway, I don’t know if y’all feel the same way about it, but there’s my piece. 03:50 Wanna talk a little bit more about the Lindsay Clancy trial, and I know that many of you have been watching it, and I’m so upset that I haven’t been able to watch
When Murder Ends in Suicide: A Recent Wave of American Murder-Suicides
When a murder ends in suicide, investigators lose one of the most important pieces of the puzzle—the person who could explain why. In this episode, I take you inside several recent murder-suicide cases from across the United States, including tragedies involving entire families, intimate partners, and parents and children. From Michigan to Oklahoma, Delaware, and Florida, these heartbreaking cases remind us that every scene tells a story, but it’s the evidence that reveals what truly happened. As a forensic death investigator, I explain how investigators reconstruct these complex scenes by examining body position, injuries, blood evidence, trajectories, fire damage, digital evidence, timelines, and countless other details. When there is no suspect to interview, no trial, and often no suicide note, the investigation must rely on science, careful documentation, and the facts left behind. We’ll also discuss why protective orders don’t always prevent violence, why investigators avoid speculation during active cases, and why it’s important to distinguish between homicide and suicide when understanding these tragedies. Throughout the episode, I share the questions investigators ask, the evidence they search for, and why the answers aren’t always immediately clear. These cases are difficult to hear, but they also highlight the dedication of investigators, first responders, and forensic professionals who work tirelessly to uncover the truth for victims and their families. Join me as we explore the investigative process behind one of the most challenging types of death investigations, and the questions that often remain when murder ends in suicide. * Listener discretion is advised. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. 00:10 Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? Hey, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Pushing Up Lilies. We are home this week and back from North Dakota. We had a great trip. Travel’s exhausting. 00:42 I don’t know if y’all feel the same way about it that I do. I’m always so excited to get there, but I’m also equally excited to get home. 00:50 Of course, I recorded the podcast from there and did homework from there, and so life didn’t really stop. 00:59 I’m really looking forward to three days from now when this semester’s over, and I can actually relax for about seven weeks before my next semester starts. 01:11 That gives me a little bit to look forward to. Maybe I can take a little trip to Fredericksburg or something to wine country during that time. That’d be kinda relaxing. I would love that. 01:22 Now, this week I planned on having Kelsey on from last week’s episode, and that is not happening just because our schedules are hard to coincide right now. 01:37 Working on having her within the next couple of weeks, but while I was gone, we had this wave of murder-suicides, and so I kinda wanted to talk a little bit about that this week instead of having Kelsey on and give her some time to get her bearings. 01:57 I know that case is relatively new, having just happened in June. 02:01 I don’t want to overwhelm her and bother her too much, so I did reach out to her, and we’ll try to get together in the next couple of weeks. 02:09 I’ve also been scheduling myself as guest host on a lot of other podcasts. 02:16 That has resulted in me hiring an executive assistant to actually help me set up all of my guest appearances and travel and that kind of stuff ’cause it gets hectic, and I don’t wanna forget something, and I always wanna be able to reach out to people, and that just keeps me on my toes a little bit more so that I can respond a little bit quicker. 02:39 Anyway, we’re gonna talk again about this recent wave of murder-suicides, and the truth is it happens every day, and not a lot of people know that. 02:51 I know that because I worked as a death investigator, but even in the small county that I worked in, there were a lot of them, and when I worked in Harris County, there were even more. 03:02 In Dallas County, there were even more. 03:05 So of course, the larger the area, the more frequently this happens, and because there’s been a wave recently, we’re hearing about it a lot in the news, but then also the recent case of the family and then also the influencers, those cases tend to make the news because family of eight and two TikTok influencers. 03:31 As social media has grown, so do the instances where we’re hearing of these more frequently. But I know we’ve all been following the news lately. 03:41 It’s very disturbing, and in a matter of weeks, we’ve seen families, husbands, wives, parents, children, and former partners become victims in cases that are described as murder-suicides. 03:55 It’s happened in Michigan, Oklahoma, Delaware, Florida, and other communities all across the country. 04:03 They’re all different people and different circumstances and different relationships, but they have the same basic ending, and that is someone decides another human being is gonna die, and then after committing the homicide, the person responsible dies by suicide. 04:22 And so tonight I wanna kinda talk you through these recent cases, but I wanna approach the episode a little bit differently because I’ve spent years investigating death, and I’ve walked into homes where someone dies unexpectedly and, of course, examined the bodies and talked to families during the worst moments of their lives. 04:45 One thing you learn quickly in death investigation is that the scene does not arrive with an explanation, so you basically have to build it. 04:54 You look at the body, you look at the environment, you look at the evidence, and of
The Questions Left Behind: What Happened to Allie Hummel?
BONUS AUDIO: SHARED WITH PERMISSION FROM ALLIE’S FRIEND BONUS AUDIO: SHARED WITH PERMISSION FROM ALLIE’S FRIEND What happens when a young, healthy woman is found dead in her own home… and the questions begin long before the investigation has answers? This week on Pushing Up Lilies, I’m taking a closer look at the life and death of Alexandra “Allie” Hummel, a 36-year-old licensed nurse from Missouri whose unexpected death remains under investigation. Based on publicly available information, I walk through the timeline of events leading up to her death, including a documented domestic violence incident that occurred less than a year earlier and why that history is significant in any death investigation. From the 911 call to the pending toxicology results, I’ll explain what investigators look for when responding to an unexpected death in the home, how prior incidents become part of the investigative process, and why every piece of evidence matters. As a forensic death investigator, I also share my professional perspective on scene documentation, autopsy findings, toxicology testing, and the importance of remaining objective while allowing the facts to determine the outcome. Most importantly, this episode is about Allie, a dedicated nurse, mother, daughter, sister, and friend whose loved ones continue to seek answers. While this investigation is still ongoing, her story also shines a light on the realities of domestic violence, the challenges victims often face, and why support systems are so important. Next week, I’ll be joined by Allie’s close friend, Kelsey, who will share personal memories of Allie and offer additional insight into the woman behind the headlines. If you or someone you love is experiencing domestic violence, please know that help is available. You are not alone. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? Hey guys, welcome to another episode of Pushing Up Lilies. I’m coming to you this week from Deadwood, South Dakota. I don’t know how many of you have been here before, but it is such a beautiful countryside. 00:44 We flew into Rapid City yesterday and we’re here for a couple of days. Then we’re going to go visit my husband’s family farm in Rock Lake, North Dakota. And then we’re going to go to Minot and spend a day at the fair, I believe, before we go home. 01:03 So just needed a little opportunity to get away. School is still schooling. I guess next week is my last week of this semester. So, I’ll be taking my final exam, which I’m extremely nervous about for this clinical. 01:19 And I have one more clinical day, and I will have my 180 hours and 180 patients in for this semester. And then we’re going to do the same thing next semester, but next semester is going to be pediatrics and family medicine. 01:34 And then my last semester is the same. So, I will be doing those rotations in Louisville as well. So, I should be done in March, y’all. So, I’m just hoping that everything goes smoothly. School is hard when you’ve been out for 30 years. 01:52 It’s really hard to try to go back. And my memory’s not what it used to be. I think I’ve told you all that before. When you’re 58, you just don’t remember things like you should. And so, it’s more difficult, even if it’s something that’s instilled in your brain that you’ve been doing for 30 years. 02:07 But today we are dedicating a full episode to the life and death of Alexandra, also known as Allie Leanne Barton Hummel. She was a 36-year-old licensed nurse from New London, Missouri. And Allie was found unresponsive in her home on June 23rd of this year, 2026. 02:31 And her death remains under investigation. Now, again, as I’ve told y’all before, this is a fully factual account based on public records, news reports, court documents, family statements, statements from friends that I have spoken to, and official statements that have been made public since the middle of this month. 02:58 There is no speculation here beyond what’s reported. I’m just going to stick to the facts. But Allie’s story is one of a dedicated healthcare professional, a sister, a friend, and a mother, and a woman whose final chapter has left her loved ones in her community seeking answers. 03:18 This is a story very similar to ones that we hear every day and very similar to ones that I have worked in the death investigation field. Now, later in this episode, I’m going to give you some professional insights into the death investigation process in cases like this. 03:38 And I’m going to announce next week’s episode. That’s going to be an interview with Allie’s friend Kelsey, who will share her perspective and memories surrounding her friend’s life and passing. Now, Alexandra, or we’ll just call her Allie. 03:55 Allie Hummel was born on July 7th of 1989. So, she would have turned 37 just two weeks after her death. She grew up in Missouri area and pursued a career in nursing, and she became a licensed nurse in that state. 04:16 She is remembered by those who knew her as a caring individual with passion for helping others. Now, Allie worked as a nurse, and we all know this is a demanding profession that often involves long hours. 04:29 It’s a lot of stress, and it has a profound impact on patients’ lives, which is why we love it. But colleagues and friends who interacted with her professionally described her positively following her death. 04:43 She was very well loved. Now, she married Dr. Andrew Michael Hummel, who was an anesthesiologist, and he operated Northern Ozark Anesthesia Solutions, which is his own
A Mother’s Life Stolen: The Murder of Caroline Piña Cairo
In this episode of Pushing Up Lilies, I’m examining the heartbreaking murder of 32-year-old Caroline Piña Cairo, a mother of five whose life was taken in a brutal daylight attack that stunned the Del Rio, Texas community. When Caroline arrived at the hospital suffering from multiple stab wounds, medical teams fought to save her life. Despite their efforts, she later succumbed to her injuries. Three women were arrested and charged with her murder, but many questions surrounding the case remain unanswered as the investigation continues. As a forensic death investigator and former emergency room nurse, I walk through what happens in the critical moments after a stabbing victim arrives at the hospital, why injuries like these can be far more severe than they first appear, and how investigators begin reconstructing a violent crime through witness statements, surveillance footage, forensic evidence, and medical findings. I also discuss why it’s so important to separate verified facts from speculation while a case is still unfolding. But more than anything, I want to remember Caroline. She wasn’t simply the victim in a headline. She was a mother, a friend, and someone remembered for her generosity and the kindness she showed others, even during difficult times in her own life. Behind every investigation is a family whose world has been forever changed, and five children who will grow up without their mother. This episode contains discussion of homicide, stabbing violence, and death. Listener discretion is advised. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:
Amy Steadman and the Mechanicville Family Deaths
In this episode of Pushing Up Lilies, I’m covering the heartbreaking case involving Amy Steadman and the tragic family deaths that shook the community of Mechanicville, New York. Cases involving multiple family members are among the most emotionally difficult for investigators, first responders, and the communities left searching for answers. As details emerged, investigators were faced with the complex task of piecing together what happened inside a home where several lives were lost, while loved ones struggled to make sense of an unimaginable tragedy. As a forensic death investigator, I discuss the investigative process behind cases like this, the importance of carefully documenting the scene, evaluating the evidence without assumptions, and understanding how investigators work to reconstruct the events that led to such devastating outcomes. I also explore the emotional toll these cases can have, not only on surviving family members, but on the professionals responsible for uncovering the truth. But beyond the investigation, I want to remember the people at the center of this story. Behind every report are individuals whose lives mattered, families forever changed, and a community left grieving. Every death investigation is about more than determining what happened, it’s about honoring those who can no longer speak for themselves and seeking answers with compassion, professionalism, and respect. This episode contains discussion of family violence, homicide, and death. Listener discretion is advised. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? Welcome to another episode of Pushing Up Lilies. I’m so happy that y’all joined us today. Still recovering from all the CrimeCon stuff. My items that I had there were boxed up and shipped back to me, and I just got them all back. 00:46 So, I’m trying to get them into my store at the Mercantile in Krum. Thank you for being patient with me. My plan was to try to do that today, but I ended up having to make a doctor’s appointment. So, it’s been kind of crazy. 00:58 Clinical tomorrow and then meds fall, med spa, and, you know, the routine. Trying to keep my head afloat while I’m finishing school. I’ve got one month left of this semester. So, I get a month and a half off and then I have two more small three-month semesters finished or left. 01:18 So hopefully it will go quickly. It seems like so far away, but I know that these days’ time flies super-fast. I want to make sure that y’all have a super safe 4th of July. I know at the medical examiner’s office, we would always frequently have drownings during the holidays when everyone’s at the lake and having their hold my beer and watch this moment. 01:41 So, keep a close eye on your friends. And my biggest thing is don’t always assume that your friends that can swim don’t still need to be watched because if they’re drinking or if they’re not super healthy, they could have a medical emergency in the water. 02:02 There are, in many cases, free life jackets available at the lakes. So, everyone in your boat should have one. There’s just a lot of ways to think ahead about how to be safe and prevent accidents and injuries and deaths. 02:19 Just kind of keep that in your head when you’re going to the lake or even when you’re just outside in the heat. Take water. Stay hydrated. We don’t want a bunch of heat strokes going on. Think about your health and the health of the others with you. 02:32 And that will help tremendously in preventing deaths and accidents and injuries. So, okay, that’s my spiel. Gonna get into this week’s episode. This week, I want to talk to you a little bit about the case regarding Amy Steadman, and this is the Mechanicville family deaths. 02:51 Now, this happened on June 23rd, so it wasn’t that long ago. This year, police in Mechanicville, New York responded to a wellness check at an apartment on Harris Avenue. Now, a neighbor had grown worried. 03:05 The family had not been seen, and the air around the apartment smelled wrong, and flies were gathering. And we’ve talked about this before when someone’s in their home, haven’t been seen in a while. They call the police for a welfare check, and it smells bad. 03:23 I mean, you’ve smelled an animal that has been decaying in the road or in the ditch, and it’s just not a pleasant smell. Those details actually matter in death investigation. Odor and flies, they tell you, obviously, that time has passed. 03:40 They tell you that something inside has changed, and they tell you that the body or bodies are no longer in an early stage of death, but they are decomposing. So, when officers actually entered Amy Steadman’s apartment, they found six people dead. 03:58 Amy Steadman was 64. Her daughter, Sarah Myers, was 44. Sarah’s daughter, Harper Harmon, was 13. Sarah’s son, Hudson Harmon, was 11. And Sarah’s 10-year-old twins were Gavin Harmon and Gracelyn Harmon. 04:17 So, all six were found inside Amy’s apartment. And even though Sarah and the children actually lived in a separate unit in the same apartment complex. Police later said that the deaths appeared criminal and evidence suggested intentional poisoning. 04:35 Investigators also said that one of the children had suffered fatal sharp force injuries. So, a handwritten note found inside the home strongly pointed towards Amy Stedman. According to the police, that’s just what they said. 04:51 Toxicology results and final medical examiner findings were still pending when these details were released. Today we’re talking about what police believe Amy Steadman did. So, we’re talking about the crime scene and the poisoning, sharp force injury,
The Survivor Who Stopped a Serial Killer
In this episode of Pushing Up Lilies, I’m examining the disturbing case of Shawn Michael Grate, a serial killer whose crimes spanned a decade across northern Ohio and left multiple families forever changed. What makes this case especially unsettling is not only the length of time the murders continued, but how many opportunities there may have been to stop the violence sooner. As investigators pieced together the evidence, a clearer picture emerged of a predator who targeted vulnerable women, leaving behind unanswered questions and unimaginable heartbreak. As a forensic death investigator, I walk through the timeline of the investigation, the evidence that ultimately connected the cases, and the forensic and investigative techniques that helped bring long-awaited answers to the victims’ families. We’ll also discuss how missing persons investigations, crime scene evidence, and victim identification play critical roles in solving complex serial homicide cases. But as with every case I cover, I want to keep the focus where it belongs. On the victims. Each woman had a life, a story, and people who loved her. Behind every headline was someone whose future was stolen far too soon. Their lives deserve to be remembered with dignity, not simply as part of a criminal’s history. This episode explores the realities of serial homicide investigations while honoring the individuals whose stories might otherwise be overshadowed by the person responsible. This episode contains discussion of homicide, sexual violence, and serial murder. Listener discretion is advised. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of Pushing Up Lilies. I am working on my home YouTube podcast studio. My office is very, there’s a lot of echoes in there. 00:47 And so, I’m going to have to do something, I think, with the walls. As you all know, I’ve been recording for years in the floor of my closet, surrounded by my clothes hanging, which serve a great buffer from outside noise. 01:01 But I’m ready to get on video. I’m ready to do this YouTube thing. I’ve also started a YouTube channel for my MedSpa called Beyond the Needle, and I’m working on the studio there at the same time. Of course, all while going to grad school, recording the podcast, taking care of my family, and working full-time at the med spa and actually attending clinicals for $0 an hour. 01:33 So, we all know at some point in our lives what that looks like. And it’s so fun, y’all. But I’ve got to get the YouTube up and going. I know that YouTube’s kind of where it’s at, trying to work a little bit on my TikTok. 01:48 I have somebody that’s going to help me with some videos. And right now, I have someone working on an intro and outro for my YouTube channels for both the MedSpa and the podcast. So, we’re going to start really pushing out the subscription boxes, the cereal boxes. 02:04 Those are great. They have the cutest things in them. I know that y’all are going to love them. And I’ve got a lot of new items with my logo on them that I took to CrimeCon. And yeah, I really need to get up to the Merk here in Krum and get all that stuff set up in that booth so that y’all can purchase some of the new stuff. 02:24 I know I’ve had a lot of y’all asking about them. First, I want to talk a little bit about my friend Stephanie. Stephanie owns a company called Soaping Up Life, and her soaps are amazing. Let me tell you, I bought some in little boxes, super cute gifts for my girlfriends for Christmas, and they loved them. 02:49 There was a bath bomb, a soap, I think a lip balm. It was just the cutest little set ever. So, if you need some self-care in your life, you’re going to find a lot of handcrafted soaps, foaming hand soaps, bath bombs, and more. 03:07 And these are made in very small batches by Stephanie at her house with skin-loving ingredients and unique fragrances that you will absolutely love. And for the ultimate treat, you need to join her subscription box, Soaping Up Life, and get a curated collection of handmade bath and body products delivered right to your door every month. 03:32 So, visit soapinguplife.com and treat yourself today. You will not be sorry. Stephanie’s soaps smell amazing. This week, we’re going to talk a little about missed opportunities. This is a case that continues today to haunt investigators across Ohio. 03:55 But first, I do want to thank y’all for spending your day with me. I know I met so many people at CrimeCon who listen every day. And some while they’re driving to work, some might be walking their dog, cleaning their house, or just sitting in their favorite chair with a cup of coffee. 04:12 But I truly appreciate you being here. Now, again, this is a story of missed opportunities and vulnerable victims. A story about a woman who actually made one phone call that saved her life and exposed a serial killer. 04:30 This is about Shawn Grate. And I want to say that this episode actually contains discussion of sexual assault, not vivid, but there were some women tortured. There were homicides involved and violence against women. 04:47 So, listener discretion is advised. I don’t go into gory details, but I want to get started a little bit on this story. Now, September 13th, 2016, we’re in Ashland, Ohio, and there was a woman trapped inside a house. 05:08 She’d been beaten. She’d been sexually assaulted. She had been bound to a bed and
Where It All Began: Julie’s Story – Host of Pushing Up Lilies
Who am I, and how did I end up investigating death for a living? Originally released as Episode One, I’m bringing this episode back for new listeners who want to know the story behind the voice of Pushing Up Lilies. This is my story, from my path into nursing to becoming a Forensic Nurse Death Investigator. I’ll talk about what drew me to this unique profession, what it’s really like to investigate deaths, and why I felt called to create this podcast. Over the years, I’ve responded to countless death scenes, worked alongside law enforcement, medical examiners, and families experiencing unimaginable loss. Those experiences have taught me that every death has a story, and understanding that story requires compassion, science, careful investigation, and sometimes asking difficult questions. Pushing Up Lilies was created to give listeners an honest look behind the scenes of death investigation. Whether you’re fascinated by forensic science, curious about how cases are solved, or simply interested in the realities of this profession, I hope this podcast helps educate, inspire, and answer questions you’ve always wondered about. If you’re new here, welcome. This episode is the perfect place to begin. If you’ve been listening for a while, thank you for being part of this journey. I’m so glad you’re here. Join me as I share the story behind the microphone, and the path that led me to Pushing Up Lilies. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? So, my journey as a forensic nurse began quite some time ago. I got out of nursing school, and at that time, there was no such thing as forensic nursing. 00:43 I was a charge nurse in the local emergency room, and my unit director came up and asked me to train to be a sexual assault nurse examiner. At the time, of course, I didn’t know much about what it was, but I did know that when we had a patient come into the emergency room that had been sexually assaulted, we would struggle to do the exam correctly because we would do the rape kit on that patient. 01:14 And it would take probably about four hours because the directions were so detailed. We didn’t want to mess anything up. It would take us away from all of our other patients. We would have to give them to another nurse and struggle to do the rape kit correctly. 01:31 It was just really a long, drawn-out process. They had decided, well, we’re going to train nurses to do this. They would do this all the time. They would be experienced. They would know what they’re doing. 01:44 They would be able to testify in court and know what trauma looked like from a sexual assault aspect. My boss asked me to do that and I did reluctantly. I wasn’t super excited about it. I really didn’t really know what I was getting into. 02:04 But over the years, and of course I’ve done that for 21 years, over the years of testifying in court and actually helping get those perpetrators sentenced, many of them or most of them, life in prison, was so invigorating to have that power to be able to help get justice for the victims. 02:31 So, over the years, I wanted to know more about forensics. I wanted to know what I could do to help in the forensics field. Keep in mind, this is before CSI and before forensic files. None of that stuff was really on TV yet, right? 02:48 So forensic nursing was just becoming a thing. So, I called my local medical examiner’s office and asked them how I could learn to be a death investigator. They told me to just get the training anywhere I could, save all my certificates, and keep my CV updated, which is what I did. 03:08 I sent myself to the University of St. Louis, to the medical school, and I took the training course. I could not get certified because I was not working in the field of death investigation, but I at least took the course and came home with that knowledge so that I could start looking for a job in death investigation. 03:30 I found one in Harris County. I moved to Houston and I worked there for years and got so much experience working with the best of the best. Houston is such a melting pot of people. There were all sorts of different things going on there, which they go on everywhere. 03:48 We just don’t hear about them. But I got the best experience ever. So, then I moved back to this area, worked briefly as deputy chief for Dallas County, then got the job working for Denton County as a forensic death investigator, which is where I’m at now. 04:10 And it’s kind of strange because when I was a child, I was scared to death of death. I would go to sleep at night, afraid I would wake up. I thought that the last thing I said to my parents before I went to bed was the last thing they were ever going to hear from me. 04:28 So, to find myself working in this field now is a little strange to me. People always ask me, how do you do it? How do you do it and still be happy? Do you not take that stuff home with you? Don’t you have dreams? 04:42 And I don’t. And I think what makes it easier for me is in the hospital, when you’re taking care of patients, you get to know them, you get to know their family, you almost feel like you’re a part of their family. 04:55 And
The State of Texas vs Karmelo Anthony
In last week’s episode, I explored the tragic death of 17-year-old Austin Metcalf and the events that unfolded during a high school track meet in Frisco, Texas. This week, I’m following the case into the courtroom as we examine The State of Texas vs. Karmelo Anthony. During this episode, I’ll walk through the key moments of the trial, the arguments presented by both the prosecution and defense, and the jury’s ultimate decision. We’ll discuss the self-defense claim raised by the defense, the testimony presented during the proceedings, and the factors that may have influenced the outcome. I’ll also review the sentencing phase and the emotional victim impact statements delivered by Austin’s family. As always, my goal is not to sensationalize tragedy, but to help listeners better understand the investigative and legal processes that follow a violent death. Cases like this often generate strong opinions and intense public discussion, but inside the courtroom, decisions must be based on evidence, testimony, and the law. Join me as we take a closer look at one of the most closely watched criminal trials in recent Texas history and examine the legal journey from a fatal encounter to a murder conviction. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? Hey guys, welcome to another episode of Pushing Up Lilies. Super excited. This is my 202nd episode. And I just want to thank everyone at the Louisville Police Department. 00:48 I spoke with their volunteers last night and I do it frequently, probably, I don’t know, once or twice a year. But it is so fun to go and visit with them. They love to hear about death investigations and exactly what death investigators do. 01:06 And it’s such an amazing group of people. And they donate so much of their time. Big shout out to that group for having me and making me feel welcome. I went into the new Louisville Police Department and it’s beautiful. 01:20 I’ve not been into the new building yet. I know that many of the officers were wondering how long it was going to take before they could get moved in, but it’s really pretty. Thank you again. I appreciate y’all so much. 01:33 This week, I need to touch on the Austin Metcalf case. I covered the Karmelo Anthony trial last week, and I just need to give y’all updates because this is in my area. It’s right down the street. So last week we talked about Karmelo Anthony, a student in Centennial High School here in Frisco. 01:55 He was charged with first degree murder back in April of 2025 for stabbing 17-year-old Austin Metcalf during a high school track meet. And one of the biggest controversies occurred before the testimony even began. 02:10 This was when the jury was chosen because the final jury actually consisted of 12 jurors and there were six alternates, but there were no black jurors seated despite Karmelo Anthony being black. Not a big deal, right, to me, just because color to me is not important. 02:33 But defense attorneys actually challenged the prosecution’s removal of several black prospective jurors, arguing that there was racial bias. Prosecutors actually stated that those jurors were struck because they were educators. 02:50 It had nothing to do with race. And the judge sided with the prosecution. And of course, outside of the courthouse, supporters of Anthony and Metcalf gathered, and tensions ran a little bit high. Wouldn’t want to be in the area during that time. 03:10 On day one, the opening statements took place. The lead prosecutor told jurors that they would see evidence showing that Anthony actually initiated the confrontation and used a concealed knife during what would have been a minor disagreement over seating under a team tent. 03:32 Now, prosecutors argued that the stabbing was intentional and that it was not at all justified. Now, as far as the defense position, defense attorney Mike Howard said that Anthony found himself surrounded and frightened. 03:51 And the defense told jurors that Anthony acted on a split second during a chaotic confrontation and that he believed he was in danger. Their theme from the very beginning was self-defense. The prosecution’s first witness was Mark Porter, and he’s a forensic video analyst. 04:13 Porter actually walked jurors through the surveillance footage from multiple cameras around the stadium. Prosecutors argued the footage showed Anthony entering the tent area, a confrontation occurring, and then Anthony leaving immediately afterwards. 04:33 Now, jurors also saw body camera footage and surveillance evidence at that time. On day two, eyewitnesses took the stand. There were several teenage witnesses and friends of Austin Metcalf’s who testified. 04:51 According to reports, those witnesses consistently described Karmelo Anthony as the aggressor. Their testimony centered really on the argument beneath the tent, Anthony’s refusal to move, and the rapid escalation that followed after that. 05:11 Multiple witnesses described Anthony producing a knife during the confrontation. This was one of the most emotional days of the testimony because many witnesses personally knew Austin Metcalfe. And so you can only imagine how difficult that would be, especially for kids in high school. 05:31 Jurors also heard details about Austin’s final moments after the stabbing, which was also, I’m sure, very difficult to hear. Now, day three, the prosecution continued calling witnesses. Jurors heard from investigators, law enforcement officers, coaches, and also others involved in the aftermath immediately after the stabbing. 05:57 Now, one significant piece of testimony involved Anthony’s statements after the stabbing and body camera footage showed Anthony telling officers he put his hands on me. Now, that statement really became important because the defense argued it supported self-defense, while prosecutors argued that it did not justify
One Final Moment: The Tragic Death of Austin Metcalf
In this episode of Pushing Up Lilies, I’m covering the heartbreaking case of 17-year-old Austin Metcalf, a high school student whose life was tragically cut short during what should have been an ordinary day at a track meet. In April 2025, a confrontation between two young men at a Frisco, Texas, athletic event ended in an act of violence that shocked a community and made headlines across the country. What began as a disagreement escalated in a matter of moments, leaving one family grieving the loss of a son, brother, friend, and teammate. As a forensic death investigator, I walk through the known timeline of events, the investigation that followed, and the legal proceedings involving Karmelo Anthony. I also discuss the difficult realities surrounding youth violence, split-second decisions, and the devastating consequences that can follow. But as with every case I cover, I want to keep the focus where it belongs. On Austin. On the life he lived, the people who loved him, and the future that was taken from him far too soon. This episode is approached with compassion and respect for everyone affected by this tragedy. Beyond the headlines, this is the story of a young life lost and a community forever changed. This episode contains discussion of violence, homicide, and the death of a minor. Listener discretion is advised. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? Hey guys, welcome to another episode of Pushing Up Lilies. I just want to say how much fun I had at CrimeCon this past weekend in Vegas. Caesar’s Palace is huge. 00:44 I had been there before, but I guess I never really truly walked around. It’s humongous. The area where they had the convention was kind of spread out and there wasn’t a lot of signage. I think the only complaint that we had was that there was no opportunity to get like a soda or a cup of coffee without walking way over from where we were all the way back into Caesar’s Palace. 01:14 And so, it’s kind of difficult to get around. Next year is going to be in Orlando in September. So, we’re already super excited about that. But I’m not going to lie. I think I’m going to drive because shipping for all my merch was ridiculous crazy. 01:30 And then I had to pay over $1,000 to have it stored before CrimeCon started. And then, of course, you have to pay for them to bring it to you. And then you have to ship back what you didn’t sell. And so, when you add all that up, you’re looking at thousands of dollars. 01:49 I know we’ve talked about this before. Podcasting really doesn’t pay. When you don’t have sponsors like a lot of us do or do not, then it’s a pretty big expense considering the fact that you’ve already taken off work to be there. 02:04 So, it had its challenges, but overall, it was amazing. We met so many nice people and I was able to pick the brain of a lot of people that have been podcasting a lot longer than me. It’s always educational and it’s such a great community because everyone really tries to help each other. 02:25 It’s not like a dog eat dog where, you know, I want to get big before you do. It’s a community of people. And I love that. We all come from different angles. We all have different experiences. We all tell stories a little bit different. 02:42 And it’s okay. There’s room for everybody. A lot of true crime lovers. I was super humbled by the number of people that came by my booth wanting my autograph and wanting my picture with them. I have a sweet little lady from California who actually said that she crochets while she’s listening to my podcast and she crocheted me a magnifying glass and it was so sweet. 03:09 It had like a little hook on it where I could like hang it on my Christmas tree. I think I’m going to do a little true crime Christmas tree in my office this year just because I think it’s neat. I thought that was amazing. 03:20 And so, I just… I love meeting people. I had a lot of people come by and say, you’re my favorite. You’re my favorite true crime podcast. I listen to you every week. And that just makes me feel so good. 03:31 Like I said, we’re all like just so humbled by this. We definitely didn’t do this to become well known or anything like that. I just like to educate. And then it helps me vent because again, like I told a lot of people, when I would come home from work after a rough day, my kids didn’t want to hear how my day went and what I did. 03:53 And my husband didn’t either. It’s a lot of trauma that you carry with you when you work in this field. You know, police officers, firefighters, EMS, people that work at the funeral home, last responders, first responders, the medical examiner’s office. 04:09 So, it’s heavy and it’s a lot of weight. And you don’t always get to decompress. And it’s really hard after you’ve had a rough day to go home and just like go to bed. And sometimes you just need to vent and talk about it. 04:25 Anyway, absolutely loved our time at CrimeCon. Hoping to go to Crime Cruise in November. We’re going to have to see how school works out for me and how I’m going to make that happen because I will be in the middle of a semester. 04:40 But
The Monster He Wanted to Become
In this episode of Pushing Up Lilies, I’m covering the heartbreaking case of Rachel Castillo, a young mother whose disappearance in Southern California led investigators to a devastating discovery, and ultimately, the conviction of her estranged husband, Zarbab Ali. Rachel vanished during what should have been a routine custody exchange involving her children. But almost immediately, investigators began uncovering signs that something was terribly wrong. What followed was an intense investigation involving surveillance footage, blood evidence, digital tracking, and a search that ended with Rachel’s body being found buried in a remote area. As a forensic death investigator, I walk through how cases like this begin to unfold behind the scenes, how small pieces of evidence start forming a timeline, how investigators interpret behavioral patterns, and how critical those early investigative decisions become when someone suddenly disappears under suspicious circumstances. This episode contains discussion of domestic violence, homicide, and burial concealment. Listener discretion is advised. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner. 00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? Hey guys, this is Julie with Pushing Up Lilies, and I can’t even begin to explain how excited I am about going to CrimeCon. I’ve never even been as just a bystander. 00:45 What little I know about it, I have learned from my new podcast friend who have been there before. And this year, I didn’t get on Creator’s Road. That was my goal. It didn’t happen. It’s fine. We’ll do it next year, y’all. 01:03 This year, I’m an exhibitor. It was rather expensive to be an exhibitor, which is fine. I feel like that’s one way to get the word out, to allow people to see who I am and to learn a little bit about my podcast. 01:18 Maybe will give me a head start for next year. But this year, I’m in Exhibitors Hall and I’m in booth 62. I’m happy to announce that my, thanks to FMG Network and my producer, Jody Colvard, my comic book is going to be for sale, limited edition at my booth at CrimeCon this year. 01:44 So super excited about that. And we are leaving on Thursday. Haven’t even packed. Don’t know what I’m wearing. Completely unorganized. I have clinical tomorrow. Life is lifing and it’s going to work out. 02:01 It always does. I’ve never been one to plan weeks and weeks ahead. Although I did have to plan a little bit in advance for CrimeCon because I did have to mail all of my merch like two weeks in advance. 02:14 So, UPS came and picked up 10 boxes from my home and delivered them at the warehouse in Vegas. They’ve all been delivered. I’ve gotten confirmation. So, they’re there, which is, it’s hard for me to kind of let go of that and make sure everything gets where it’s supposed to be. 02:32 They all arrived. And so, I’m super excited that when we get there to our booth, we call and bring them over from the warehouse to our booth. And then we unload the boxes and then they take the empty boxes back to the warehouse. 02:45 It sounds like a well-oiled machine. We shall see. I am already getting ideas for next year. So, I guess that’s the way it happens, right? When you start doing things like this. I’m getting some invitations to attend other conferences, which I so appreciate. 03:04 I do need to try to find some sponsors because these things aren’t free and podcasting pays $0 an hour unless you have a sponsor. So, what little bit of monetary value that I’m getting from this now is just selling my merch. 03:21 So, if you are interested, all of my merch will be available on my website soon. And if you’re coming to CrimeCon, stop by Booth 62 in the exhibitors hall and buy some. I would very much appreciate it. 03:34 Now, I do have to say, okay, we’re leaving Thursday. We’ll be back on June 1st. Caesar’s Palace. It’s going to be so fun. I have to say I’m a little bit nervous because, again, I’ve never been there, but everything seems to always kind of work out. 03:51 So, I’m trying not to sweat it and not to worry too much. But I do have to tell y’all that I discovered today that today is my 200th episode. So what I’m going to do, I’m going to post something about my 200th episode on Facebook and I will give you the opportunity to drop in your email, a private message me, your email, and that’ll put you in a drawing for a giveaway. 04:19 I’m just feeling like giving stuff away. So, I feel like we need to celebrate in some way. 200 episodes is huge. That actually is a little less than four years. I think that that’s a milestone. And y’all, I’ve done this in my closet floor on my laptop every week for four years. 04:42 If that’s not commitment, I don’t know what is. I would love your support. Follows and shares are amazing. If you know anybody who’s interested in sponsorship, that would be even more amazing. But I look forward to seeing all of you who are planning to come to CrimeCon. 05:00 I want to talk this week about a case that makes you very angry, and a lot of them do. This one also makes you sad, as most of them do. There are a lot of cases that make you physically uncomfortable because they force you to look directly into the darkest corners of human behavior. 05:20 And this is one of those cases. This is the story of Rachel Castillo, and she was a 25-year-old
