Pushing Up Lillies
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  • Julie Mattson
  • May 27, 2026May 27, 2026
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The Monster He Wanted to Become

In this episode of Pushing Up Lilies, I’m covering the heartbreaking case of Rachel Castillo, a young mother whose disappearance in Southern California led investigators to a devastating discovery, and ultimately, the conviction of her estranged husband, Zarbab Ali. Rachel vanished during what should have been a routine custody exchange involving her children. But almost immediately, investigators began uncovering signs that something was terribly wrong. What followed was an intense investigation involving surveillance footage, blood evidence, digital tracking, and a search that ended with Rachel’s body being found buried in a remote area. As a forensic death investigator, I walk through how cases like this begin to unfold behind the scenes, how small pieces of evidence start forming a timeline, how investigators interpret behavioral patterns, and how critical those early investigative decisions become when someone suddenly disappears under suspicious circumstances. This episode contains discussion of domestic violence, homicide, and burial concealment. Listener discretion is advised. EPISODE TRANSCRIPT: 00:06 Welcome to Pushing Up Lilies. I’m your host, Julie Mattson. Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, and terrifyingly true stories from my perspective as a forensic death investigator and a sexual assault nurse examiner.  00:24 Do I have some stories for you? Are you ready? Hey guys, this is Julie with Pushing Up Lilies, and I can’t even begin to explain how excited I am about going to CrimeCon. I’ve never even been as just a bystander. 00:45 What little I know about it, I have learned from my new podcast friend who have been there before. And this year, I didn’t get on Creator’s Road. That was my goal. It didn’t happen. It’s fine. We’ll do it next year, y’all.  01:03 This year, I’m an exhibitor. It was rather expensive to be an exhibitor, which is fine. I feel like that’s one way to get the word out, to allow people to see who I am and to learn a little bit about my podcast.  01:18 Maybe will give me a head start for next year. But this year, I’m in Exhibitors Hall and I’m in booth 62. I’m happy to announce that my, thanks to FMG Network and my producer, Jody Colvard, my comic book is going to be for sale, limited edition at my booth at CrimeCon this year.  01:44 So super excited about that. And we are leaving on Thursday. Haven’t even packed. Don’t know what I’m wearing. Completely unorganized. I have clinical tomorrow. Life is lifing and it’s going to work out.  02:01 It always does. I’ve never been one to plan weeks and weeks ahead. Although I did have to plan a little bit in advance for CrimeCon because I did have to mail all of my merch like two weeks in advance.  02:14 So, UPS came and picked up 10 boxes from my home and delivered them at the warehouse in Vegas. They’ve all been delivered. I’ve gotten confirmation. So, they’re there, which is, it’s hard for me to kind of let go of that and make sure everything gets where it’s supposed to be.  02:32 They all arrived. And so, I’m super excited that when we get there to our booth, we call and bring them over from the warehouse to our booth. And then we unload the boxes and then they take the empty boxes back to the warehouse.  02:45 It sounds like a well-oiled machine. We shall see. I am already getting ideas for next year. So, I guess that’s the way it happens, right? When you start doing things like this. I’m getting some invitations to attend other conferences, which I so appreciate.  03:04 I do need to try to find some sponsors because these things aren’t free and podcasting pays $0 an hour unless you have a sponsor. So, what little bit of monetary value that I’m getting from this now is just selling my merch.  03:21 So, if you are interested, all of my merch will be available on my website soon. And if you’re coming to CrimeCon, stop by Booth 62 in the exhibitors hall and buy some. I would very much appreciate it.  03:34 Now, I do have to say, okay, we’re leaving Thursday. We’ll be back on June 1st. Caesar’s Palace. It’s going to be so fun. I have to say I’m a little bit nervous because, again, I’ve never been there, but everything seems to always kind of work out.  03:51 So, I’m trying not to sweat it and not to worry too much. But I do have to tell y’all that I discovered today that today is my 200th episode. So what I’m going to do, I’m going to post something about my 200th episode on Facebook and I will give you the opportunity to drop in your email, a private message me, your email, and that’ll put you in a drawing for a giveaway.  04:19 I’m just feeling like giving stuff away. So, I feel like we need to celebrate in some way. 200 episodes is huge. That actually is a little less than four years. I think that that’s a milestone. And y’all, I’ve done this in my closet floor on my laptop every week for four years.  04:42 If that’s not commitment, I don’t know what is. I would love your support. Follows and shares are amazing. If you know anybody who’s interested in sponsorship, that would be even more amazing. But I look forward to seeing all of you who are planning to come to CrimeCon.  05:00 I want to talk this week about a case that makes you very angry, and a lot of them do. This one also makes you sad, as most of them do. There are a lot of cases that make you physically uncomfortable because they force you to look directly into the darkest corners of human behavior.  05:20 And this is one of those cases. This is the story of Rachel Castillo, and she was a 25-year-old

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Pushing Up Lilies

Pushing Up Lilies
Pushing Up Lilies

Dissect the science behind some of the most spine-tingling, unusual and terrifyingly true crime stories with Julie Mattson, a seasoned Forensic Nurse Death Investigator in this gripping weekly podcast.

Julie’s unique approach to investigations is informed by her background in nursing, which allows her to provide an in-depth analysis of the medical intricacies and physiological aspects of each case.

With her compassionate storytelling and unwavering dedication to uncovering the truth, Julie takes you on a thrilling journey into the world of forensic science, shining a light on the intersection of medicine, justice and criminal investigation.

In “Pushing Up Lilies,” Julie’s expert medical analysis will captivate your imagination and challenge your understanding of the human body’s role in solving the most complex and enigmatic criminal case.

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The Monster He Wanted to Become
byJulie Mattson

In this episode of Pushing Up Lilies, I’m covering the heartbreaking case of Rachel Castillo, a young mother whose disappearance in Southern California led investigators to a devastating discovery, and ultimately, the conviction of her estranged husband, Zarbab Ali.

Rachel vanished during what should have been a routine custody exchange involving her children. But almost immediately, investigators began uncovering signs that something was terribly wrong. What followed was an intense investigation involving surveillance footage, blood evidence, digital tracking, and a search that ended with Rachel’s body being found buried in a remote area.

As a forensic death investigator, I walk through how cases like this begin to unfold behind the scenes, how small pieces of evidence start forming a timeline, how investigators interpret behavioral patterns, and how critical those early investigative decisions become when someone suddenly disappears under suspicious circumstances.

This episode contains discussion of domestic violence, homicide, and burial concealment. 

Listener discretion is advised.

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Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, terrifyingly true stories with a forensic twist, hosted by Julie Mattson.

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Pushing Up Lilies is a weekly true crime podcast with spine-tingling, unusual, terrifyingly true stories with a forensic twist, hosted by Forensic Nurse Death Investigator, Julie Mattson.

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Recent Episodes

The Monster He Wanted to Become

The Death of Spencer Irwin: Questions Left Behind

The Shocking Torture and Murder of Sonia Exelby

Inside the Crime that Shook a Community – Part Three

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